Come On, You Homosexual Demon

No need to go to uncivilized, pestilence-ridden hovels at the far corners of the earth for crazy. We've got plenty of that right here in the U.S. of A.

Witness for yourself a "gay exorcism;" the attempt to cast a "homosexual demon" out of a teenage boy. The religious scene features a disgusting display of bigoted ignorance.

(It's unclear to me whether the alleged demon in question is itself homosexual, or if it merely causes homosexuality in its purported victim. I suppose a gay demon that also causes gayness would be particularly hard to exorcise.)

Automated Prayer

I'm not sure whether this is supposed to be a joke (via For Truth).

The idea is that, for only $3.95 per month, you can set up a "subscription service utilizing a computer with text-to-speech capability to incant your prayers each day. It gives you the satisfaction of knowing that your prayers will always be said even if you wake up late, or forget."

You can choose Protestant, Catholic, Jewish, Muslim, or generic prayers.

Some people have an astounding propensity for strangeness.

Emotionalist Worship

Thanks to Flibbert, I ran across two bizarrely interesting videos of religious worship.

"

In the first, a toddler walks around the stage spouting impassioned nonsense in the style of an old-time country sermon.



In the second, Marjoe Gortner continues to pretend to be a faith healer for a time even after he has become convinced that it's all nonsense.

One message to take from this is that some people are just goofy. They do things that make no sense. This is true whether they package their nonsense in religion or something else.

However, there is an especial tendency with religion, grounded as it is in faith, to promote emotionalist, cathartic practices quite separated from any understanding of reality. While religion at its best is quite sophisticated and intellectual, religion's popular manifestations seem to lean toward the other variety.

Playboy's Prayer

As a interesting follow-up to Easter, Fox hosts a story about a former Playboy Bunny:

Kendra Wilkinson is known across the world as being Hugh Hefner’s wonderfully wild former flame, but since moving out of the Playboy mansion and getting engaged to Philadelphia Eagle Hank Baskett, it seems Wilkinson is choosing prayers over posing.

"Hank makes her pray before meals now. His family is so religious and he really calmed her down a lot, he's good for her," Kendra's bridesmaid and playmate Brittany Ginger told Tarts, with Kendra adding that praying is a new experience that has helped her change "for the better."

But we may wonder how truly converted Wilkinson is. She said, "...Hef opened up doors for me... It was my job to make the right decisions and go about my life from there... He was a father figure for me; he gave me wings and appreciated me for me. You can see the blonde/big boobs thing but he actually appreciated me for me, I always knew that about him. He gave me such happiness, having his eyes on me gave me confidence just to be me and find Hank."

Oh, and, by the way, the wedding will take place at the Playboy Mansion. How absolutely bizarre.

The point here is that, while a lot of people claim to believe in God, some of those people don't really take religion all that seriously. Unfortunately, many of the same people don't seem to take much of anything seriously. There can be worse fates than religion.

L. Ron Simpson

"Twentieth Century Fox television would not comment on whether Nancy Cartwright, the voice of Bart on 'The Simpsons,' will face disciplinary action following her voice message urging Scientologists, in Bart's voice, to attend an upcoming conference."

This is a legitimate contractual matter; Fox pays the lady quite a lot (I presume) to provide Bart's voice, and use of the voice elsewhere reduces its value.

Why Scientologists think that using Bart's voice might help them is another matter entirely. But I guess Bart Simpson is taken a lot more seriously in the culture than L. Ron Hubbard.

Haggard, Again

Once upon a time, Ted Haggard was the respected senior pastor of the gigantic New Life Church in Colorado Springs. He was let go after news surfaced that he had hired a drug-dealing male prostitute to do who knows what. Now, the AP reports, there are new allegations that he had a lengthy sexual relationship with a male church volunteer. Oh, and HBO is coming out with a documentary about him. Can the story get any stranger?

January 26 update: Paula Woodward reports for 9News, "Former New Life Church pastor Ted Haggard's return to the national spotlight is being marred by new allegations he performed a sexual act in front of a young male church volunteer on a trip in 2006. The man tells KRDO-TV in Colorado Springs the incident was not consensual."

Obama Called Antichrist by Denver Cop

Doesn't Barack Obama have enough flaws without making up bizarre fictions about him? The AP reports that a Denver police officer sent out an e-mail claiming that a presidential candidate -- guess who -- may be a harbinger of the End of Days. The e-mail stated that the "Anti-Christ will be a man, in his 40's, of Muslim descent."

Here is a comparable message collected by Snopes:

According to the Book of Revelations the anti-christ is: The anti-christ will be a man, in his 40s, of MUSLIM descent, who will deceive the nations with persuassive language, and have a MASSIVE Christ-like appeal.... the prophecy says that people will flock to him and he will promise false hope and world peace, and when he is in power, will destory everything. Is it OBAMA??

Inquiring minds want to know.

Beyond the fact that Revelation says no such thing about any antichrist, Snopes points out that "since the book of Revelation was complete by the end of the second century, but the religion of Islam wasn't founded until about four hundred years later, the notion that Revelation would have mentioned a 'Muslim' at all is rather far-fetched."

But people can read into these works basically whatever they want.

Obama's political problem is not that he is opposed to Christ, but that he seeks weaken the wall between church and state through faith-based welfare and "brotherly love" (meaning federal controls). Obama doesn't need to be the antichrist to royally screw up the U.S. economy, as I fear he'll do.

We need to worry about the real Christians and their political controls (in addition to the left's political controls), not some fantasy antichrist.

"A Spirit of Witchcraft"

I guess that since Sarah Palin is supposed to be the reincarnation of Ronald Reagan, it's appropriate that she's turning into a Teflon Vice-President. It seems that, no matter how kooky her background becomes, the conservatives will rally to her cause. Part of the problem is that some of the stuff is so bizarre it's hard to take seriously; it seems like an elaborate practical joke.

Keith Olbermann reviews Palin's comments about Pastor Thomas Muthee.

Hannah Strange reports for The Times:

The pastor whose prayer Sarah Palin says helped her to become governor of Alaska founded his ministry with a witchhunt against a Kenyan woman who he accused of causing car accidents through demonic spells.

At a speech at the Wasilla Assembly of God on June 8 this year, Mrs Palin described how Thomas Muthee had laid his hands on her when he visited the church as a guest preacher in late 2005, prior to her successful gubernatorial bid. ...

An African evangelist, Pastor Muthee has given guest sermons at the Wasilla Assembly of God on at least 10 occasions in his role as the founder of the Word of Faith Church, also known as the Prayer Cave. ...

"We prayed, we fasted, the Lord showed us a spirit of witchcraft resting over the place," Pastor Muthee says. ...

According to the Christian Science Monitor, six months of fervent prayer and research identified the source of the witchcraft as a local woman called Mama Jane, who ran a "divination" centre called the Emmanuel Clinic. ...

The "witch" eventually was run out of town.

Here's what the Christian Science Monitor has to say about Muthee:

In 1988, [Kenyan pastor Thomas Muthee] and his wife, Margaret, were "called by God to Kiambu," a notorious, violence-ridden suburb of Nairobi and a "ministry graveyard" for churches for years. They began six months of fervent prayer and research.

Pondering the message of Eph.6:12 ("For we wrestle not against flesh and blood, but against principalities, against powers, against the rulers of the darkness of this world..."), they prayed to identify the source of Kiambu's spiritual oppression, Mr. Muthee says. Their answer: the spirit of witchcraft.

This election is increasingly a contest of the crazies. Certainly this is the most frightening election of my lifetime.

Holy Lawsuits and MP3s

The AP has reported that, after a man asked God for "a real experience," he "he fell and hit his head while worshipping." So he's suing the church for $2.5 million. Why isn't he suing the Holy Spirit? You'd think that, after going to all the trouble of filling the guy with the Holy Spirit, God would take the additional step of making sure he didn't bump his head on the way to the floor. Of course, some of us may wonder whether people have the "real experience" that they expect to have, in which case I hardly think the church is liable, either. Of course, churches could, for example, issue bicycle helmets or the like before channeling God's spirit into worshippers. Lest you think that Holy Helmets are ridiculous, consider the next story...

Atheist Nexus points to a Godlike new mp3 player, shaped like a cross. Christian music just isn't the same unless it's blaring through a cross-shaped player. "Show off your faith and listen to MP3 files with this 2 GB USB 'Cross Style' MP3 player," and all for only -- you guessed it -- $19.99. Because we all know that mp3 technology, and the computer revolution generally, came about through prayer and supernatural intervention.

Angels on Earth?

Call it the Christian's Enquirer. My wife received in the mail an invitation to subscribe to Angels On Earth magazine. Here's the pitch:

We have reserved in your name a FREE issue of ANGELS ON EARTH, an inspiring magazine about God's messengers and their work in the world. And when you accept it, you also get a FREE GIFT -- the 2009 ANGELS ON EARTH CALENDAR! [OMG!]

There is no risk -- no obligation to subscribe. We simply want you to experience this magazine presenting the stories of angels and the messages they deliver.

Stories of tragedies averted and destinies altered. Stories filled with profound mystery, yet radiating faith-affirming hope!

Angels still visit us today, ministering spirits guard us and guide us and give us reassuring evidence of God's love. You'll find these stories in ANGELS ON EARTH. ...

Wow. There are enough people who believe this nonsense to support a magazine. And I suspect that, relative to the Enquirer, a higher percent of subscribers help choose our political leaders.

I can hardly believe I have to make this point in the modern world, but here it goes. What are all these alleged angels doing when people die in car crashes, die at the hands of criminals, get cancer, or drown? What about "stories of tragedies not averted" and "destinies altered for the worse?" The claim that angels are responsible for all things pleasant in the world is a gross sort of bias that simply ignores cause and effect, luck, and contradictory facts.

Lord Hanuman University

An AP story about a monkey god appointed chairman of an Indian business school raised my eyebrows.

PTI reports, "The Sardar Bhagat Singh College of Technology and Management... has Lord Hanumnan's [sic] idol occupying the place of pride in unfamiliar surroundings of the chairman's office."

Wikipedia has a lengthy entry about the new chair.

Somehow, I have a hard time believing that this is primarily about piety. One obvious result of the appointment is a lot of media attention.

PTI adds, "One of the two vice chairmen, Vivek Kangri said that the 'chairman' has delegated all powers in him and the other vice chairman to act on his behalf." This seems like a pretty good way to diffuse responsibilities -- and criticism.

We Coloradans can't make too much fun of Hanuman's college position. He's a lot less silly than, say, Ward Churchill.

Coca-Cola Crucifixions

Invesco Field at Mile High. Coors Field. I can handle that. But Coca-Cola Crucifixions? That's going a bit far. Yet, according to the Telegraph, Coca-Cola and Smart Telecommunications are sponsoring a festival in the Philippines in which people reenact the crucifixion of Jesus, in some cases using real nails. The March 20 article by Thomas Bell carries the absurdly understated title: "Easter warning: crucifixion is bad for you."

The link also shows a Reuters photo of a man hanging from a cross with nails through his hands. Well, he's cheating a bit, because his arms are tied to the crossbeam with ropes, and the nails are pounded through his palms. As I learned in my childhood church, the nails actually went through the wrists, so that they didn't tear through the flesh between the bones in the palms. (You wouldn't want people falling off their crosses!) And part of the agony of crucifixion is that it's hard to breath while hanging from the wrists, so you have to keep lifting yourself up by the nails in your wrists, until you become too exhausted to do so and suffocate to death. The man shown in the photo doesn't look especially comfortable, but the ropes are denying him his opportunity to fully share in the misery of Christ. But, then, these people don't imagine that they can come back to life after decomposing in a tomb for three days, so they get to come down off their crosses before doing too much physical damage to themselves. (While I learned little in my church about, for instance, the Christian takeover of Roman government, I learned quite a lot about crucifixions.)

Anyway, the article reports:

Many people in the Philippines consider crucifixion and self flagellation good for the soul, but it is bad for your health according to new government advice for penitents.

"We are not trying to go against the Lenten tradition here because whipping has somewhat already become some form of 'atonement for sins' for some of us," Health Secretary Francisco Duque the 3rd said.

"Getting deep cut wounds during whippings or lashings is inevitable and being so exposed during the course of the penitence, with all the heat and dust blowing in the wind, welcomes all sorts of infections and bacteria like tetanus," he explained.

Re-enactments of the Passion of Christ are common in many parts of the mostly Roman Catholic Philippines but frowned upon by the church authorities.

In San Fernando City 23 people, including two women, have signed up to re-enact the crucifixion at three "improvised Golgothas" around town. Four of them will use real nails.

The city government's website trumpets the preparations.

"The City Health Office (CHO) autoclaved all the nails to be used and will administer anti-tetanus vaccine to all the 'Cristos' to ensure their protection from possible infection," it points out. City officials will conduct an inspection of the Golgothas on Thursday. ... [Credit for link: Paul Hsieh]

Doesn't this juxtaposition of tatanus shots, made possible by germ theory and medical science, alongside ritualistic self-torture, strike anyone as, you know, odd?

Thankfully, here in Denver, reenactments of the crucifixion don't involve actual nails.

Voluntary crucifixion, while morally reprehensible, is similar to prostitution in that it should be legal for consenting adults, however stupid and self-destructive it is. But for the local government to sanction the event is -- I struggle to come up with an adequate adjective. Absurd? Ridiculous? Hysterical? Detestable? Horrific?

But maybe Coca-Cola can push the gig a bit further. Do you think sugar water can be subject to transubstantiation?

Was Moses on Drugs?

I'm not quite sure what to make of this March 4 story from RawStory (hat tip FreedomsPhoenix):

High on Mount Sinai, Moses was on psychedelic drugs when he heard God deliver the Ten Commandments, an Israeli researcher claimed in a study published this week.

Such mind-altering substances formed an integral part of the religious rites of Israelites in biblical times, Benny Shanon, a professor of cognitive psychology at the Hebrew University of Jerusalem wrote in the Time and Mind journal of philosophy.

Following is the abstract of the article:

A speculative hypothesis is presented according to which the ancient Israelite religion was associated with the use of entheogens (mind-altering plants used in sacramental contexts). The hypothesis is based on a new look at texts of the Old Testament pertaining to the life of Moses. The ideas entertained here were primarily based on the fact that in the arid areas of the Sinai peninsula and Southern Israel there grow two plants containing the same psychoactive molecules found in the plants from which the powerful Amazonian hallucinogenic brew Ayahuasca is prepared. The two plants are species of Acacia tree and the bush Peganum harmala. The hypothesis is corroborated by comparative experiential-phenomenological observations, linguistic considerations, exegesis of old Jewish texts and other ancient Mideastern traditions, anthropological lore, and ethnobotanical data.

Notably, the journal makes the full text available for free. I have not yet read through it to see whether the claims are supported by real evidence, but the descriptive "speculative" did jump out at me from the abstract.

Yet I hardly need to entertain the notion that Moses may have been on hallucinogens to reject the claim that God spoke to Moses through a burning bush.

The more interesting implication is for the religious right's war on drugs.

The Absurdity of 'Revirgination'

MSNBC ran a story on February 28 about "revirgination." Yes, it's as ridiculous as it sounds. Look, if you've had sex, if you've had children, you are not a virgin. Get over it. No, even if you spend $5,000 for a new hymen -- and who wouldn't want one of those -- you are still not a virgin. (God forbid that the money go for anything that is actually of some value.)

Thankfully, I do not have to spend my time pointing out all of the absurdities of "revirgination," for Diana Hsieh has already done the job. She writes,

Virginity is not even a real quality of a person: it's just an ignorance of and inexperience with sex. Ignorance of sex means incompetence at sex. So for a rational, value-seeking lover, virginity can only be an obstacle to be overcome in the pursuit of the pleasures of sex, not a positive value. For a person to seek virginity requires a mangled set of sexual values.

There is a very dark side to the story, though:

Dr. Red Alinsod's... typical patient [for hymen reconstruction] may have been born and raised in the United States, but with significant family in Malaysia, Indonesia, Vietnam, Pakistan, India, the Middle East. Without evidence a new bride is a virgin, she risks being rejected, or, worse, the victim of an "honor killing."

For many women around the world -- particularly in Muslim countries -- such threats of murder are difficult to avoid. But surely women "born and raised in the United States" might consider the option of not marrying someone with homicidal siblings. At the cultural level, when women have to lie about their virginity in order not to be murdered, that's a large problem, and surgery is hardly the appropriate remedy.

No Yoga for Christians?

I just completed a month's membership at a local yoga studio, and I was trying to find some information on the growth of yoga (as well as massage) over the last few decades. I didn't find the figures I was looking for (so if anybody has a good source, please let me know), but I did find the following peculiar commentary on the "eChristian" blog: "Can a Pagan Practice be 'Christianized?' -- Yoga."

First a word about my own limited experience with yoga. There was a class about "chakras" that I simply refused to attend. And I've had enough "hare krishna" chanting to last a lifetime. (Thankfully, I think that CD got scratched. I promise I had nothing to do with that.) But, in general, yoga is just a form of exercise that emphasizes stretching. As my neck and shoulders often get tense as I type, for me that works great. I just ignore the occasional mumbo-jumbo. When my wife and I do yoga alone at home, we stick to the moves that work for us and don't worry about our fifth chakras. As with martial arts, yoga comes from a specific region and contains some superfluous elements that can be safely ignored.

But yoga is a no-no for Christians, at least according to Marsha West, who originally wrote the piece on January 25, 2008, for NewsWithViews.com. At the top of that page, we discover that West is "Battling The Culture of Destruction." The upshot is that "Christians should avoid yoga and seek other alternatives." Following are her essential points:

...The Bible says, "Have nothing to do with the fruitless deeds but rather expose them." Exposing evil keeps Christians from being "polluted by the world." And yes, yoga is evil. ...

Now here's the main reason Christians should avoid yoga. Christian apologists John Ankerberg and John Weldon maintain that, "The basic premise of yoga theory is the fundamental unity of all existence: God, man, and all of creation are ultimately one divine reality." ...

Pope Benedict XVI is not at all happy about the large number of Christians practicing yoga. Recently he gave this warning: "Yoga can degenerate into the cult of the body."

S. Michael Houdmann thinks yoga is blatantly anti-Christian philosophy. "It teaches one to focus on oneself instead of on the one true God. It encourages its participants to seek the answers to life's difficult questions within their own conscience instead of in the Word of God. It also leaves one open to deception from God's enemy, who searches for victims that he can turn away from God (1 Peter 5:8)."

West goes on to criticize "CY," or Christian Yoga:

[O]ccult and cult expert, Caryl Matrisciana... warns that yoga postures, "are designed to form one's body into the likeness of man, animals, birds, insects, snakes, fish, and many more--all of which are revered as gods in Hinduism."

West seems to have forgotten all about the fact that the "Christian" holidays of Christmas and Easter are based on older pagan customs. So, even from the Christian perspective, West's comments are pretty crazy. Then again, the Christians did go through a period of destroying Roman pagan art, as some Protestants later destroyed Catholic art. So West's type of insanity is not entirely new to Christianity. Moreover, at least historically many Christians were quite serious about denying the flesh and such, and it's true that yoga promotes physical health. For some Christians, the "cult of the body" refers to anything whatsoever that feels remotely good or that emphasizes sensory perception.

Of course, I want to make a somewhat broader criticism: West is telling people to reject one sort of mythology as "evil" -- and to accept as literal truth another sort of mythology.

Most mythologies, including Christianity, have at least something positive to offer to rational people. If the Hindus gave us yoga, great -- that doesn't mean I have to accept the mystical baggage, any more than I have to accept the mystical baggage of Christmas to enjoy that holiday.

Christian Kitsch

Thanks to Heavenly Images, you can send in a photo of your deceased loved one and it will come back showing your loved one with Jesus. You can also do this for photos of the living. (Paul Hsieh alerted me to the link.)

Don't miss the testimonials, including the following:

[Grandma] was so withdrawn, but since receiving her photo of my dad & Jesus she has come out of the house twice... I give all praises to God." ...

I want to thank you so much for doing this. I lost my mother 7 months ago. This picture makes me feel more at ease.

Of course, rather than spend a minimum of $30 for this service (and that's for a pet; it's unclear to me why humans cost more), you could find a friend with some simple design software to do it for free. But, hey, it's only $3 extra to include a poem or verse.

The main Heavenly Images page also explains why you should believe in Jesus and heaven. The upshot is that the New Testament is proven to be fact by eye witnesses, and if you don't believe in Jesus you won't go to Heaven (and, presumably, will instead go to Hell).

While you're at it, don't miss the advertised links: you can get Bible Verses Ringtones, Faith Clip Art, and even a hot Christian date.

It's all enough to make Jesus himself swear ("me, mom, an mom's husband!")

Looking Good for Jesus

The AP reports:

SINGAPORE -- A cosmetics line that extolled the virtues of "Looking Good for Jesus" has been pulled from stores in Singapore after a number of complaints from shoppers, according to media reports Tuesday.

You can also view photos of the products. (The zippered change purse is perhaps the most outrageous; it says, "Be Not Worthy; Be Noticed; Show Him the Money.")

The AP reports that The Straits Times quoted several critics. Nick Chui said, "These products trivialize Jesus Christ and Christianity. There are also sexual innuendoes in the messages and the way Jesus is portrayed in these products." Grace Ong said, "Why would anyone use religious figures to promote vanity products? It's very disrespectful and distasteful."

However, I doubt that anyone would have grown too excited over Zeus's Zit Zap or Isis Eye Cream.

I wondered whether some American entrepreneur has made the products available. Sure enough. And here and here. And in the UK.

Of course, the churches that I've seen don't exactly discourage the use of makeup and other self-enhancement products, particularly at singles' groups. (Tammy Faye comes to mind.)

At least the Christians don't make death threats and go on destructive rampages when their prophet takes a little ribbing or serious criticism, the way that many followers of another popular religion do. Or would anyone dare to sell "Looking Good for Mohammed" on the streets of the Middle East or even in Paris, London, or Copenhagen?

McCain, Romney, and the Politics of Satan

Recently I wrote that "Romney's religious background did hurt him, not only among some urbanites, but among some evangelical Christians." How much did Romney's Mormonism hurt him among Catholics and Protestants? And just how different is Mormonism from those other Christian strains?

James Dobson of Focus on the Family recently endorsed Mike Huckabee. (In response to concerns that he is so far behind the delegate count, Huckabee responded, "Well, I didn’t major in math. I majored in miracles. And I still believe in those, too.")

Notably, Dobson endorsed Huckabee only after Romney left the race; Romney's Mormonism was not a deal-breaker for Dobson in terms of presidential politics:

I am endorsing Gov. Mike Huckabee for President of the United States today. My decision comes in the wake of my statement on Super Tuesday that I could not vote for Sen. John McCain, even if he goes on to win the Republican nomination. His record on the institution of the family and other conservative issues makes his candidacy a matter of conscience and concern for me.

That left two pro-family candidates whom I could support, but I was reluctant to choose between them. However, the decision by Gov. Mitt Romney to put his campaign "on hold" changes the political landscape. The remaining candidate for whom I could vote is Gov. Huckabee. His unwavering positions on the social issues, notably the institution of marriage, the importance of faith and the sanctity of human life, resonate deeply with me and with many others.

Notice that Dobson's sole criteria here are issues particular to Christian dogma. Christians believe that homosexuality is wrong, and Dobson supported the Constitutional amendment to ban gay marriage. McCain did not support that amendment, even though he has come out strongly in favor of the view that "the institution of marriage is a union between one man and one woman." But on this point Dobson insists on agreement with means as well as ends; he does not see as adequate prohibiting gay marriage (or "domestic partnerships") by means other than a Constitutional ban.

In opposing the Constitutional measure, McCain cited federalism:

"The constitutional amendment we're debating today strikes me as antithetical in every way to the core philosophy of Republicans," McCain said. "It usurps from the states a fundamental authority they have always possessed and imposes a federal remedy for a problem that most states do not believe confronts them."

Dobson also puts McCain outside of the anti-abortion camp, even though McCain has stated that his ultimate aim is "ending abortion."

So, even though McCain has essentially adopted Dobson's religious-right platform, the very reason that I will vote for McCain's opponent, McCain's positions on these issues are not strong enough for Dobson.

As a side note, at least Ann Coulter gave reasons for opposing McCain other than those grounded in Christian faith:

He promoted amnesty for 20 million illegal immigrants. He abridged citizens' free speech (in favor of the media) with McCain-Feingold. He hysterically opposes waterboarding terrorists and wants to shut down Guantanamo. He denounced the Swift Boat Veterans for Truth. He opposes ANWR and supports the global warming cult, even posturing with fellow mountebank Arnold Schwarzenegger in front of solar panels.

I have no basic problem with McCain's view on amnesty, but I agree with Coulter that McCain's censorship law is terrible. In my view, that single position should disqualify McCain from any elected office.

Of course, Coulter also finds fault with McCain's partial support for stem-cell research and his marginally "soft" position on abortion. This tells us something about the religious right. It is not enough for the religious right merely for a candidate to advocate "ending abortion;" the candidate must stop at nothing to achieve that aim. Yet the view that a fertilized egg is the equivalent of a human person is based on nothing but religious dogma, and a ban on abortion would sacrifice the real rights of people to the make-believe rights of embryos.

But on to Romney's Mormonism. David Harsanyi wrote a humorous yet poignant column about the issue:

...Mitt Romney's exit from the presidential race was inevitable the moment evangelical voters heard he was a Mormon.

Evangelicals have shown us they now have a stranglehold on the Republican Party. ...

In 2006, Dr. James Dobson -- whose wife excluded Mormons from participation in the National Day of Prayer that she chaired in 2004 -- explained, "I don't believe that conservative Christians in large numbers will vote for a Mormon...."

... When asked if he considered Mormonism a cult or a religion, Huckabee answered, "I think it's a religion. I really don't know much about it ... . Don't Mormons believe that Jesus and the devil are brothers?"

Golly, gee, ya think? (All this time I thought the Dark Lord Xenu was Satan's brother.)

It seems perfectly reasonable to vote against a candidate based on faith, if the candidate's beliefs conflict and/or pose a theocratic threat to the Constitution.

An example of this latent danger might be seen in an aspiring presidential candidate declaring his supporters to be members of "God's Army" or "soldiers for Christ." A candidate like Huckabee.

The alleged belief that "Jesus and the devil are brothers" is hardly stranger than any belief of Catholic or Protestant Christianity. Indeed, the idea that gods have offspring arose long before Christianity. But is Huckabee's claim true? Certainly many other Christians think so. For example, GodVoter.org (!) -- "Honoring God In Election 2008" (!!) -- claims:

"What evidence do you have that Mormonism teaches Jesus is Satan's brother?"

Quoted below are the founder, presidents, leaders and writings of Mormonism on your question, the teaching that God began as man, and the Mormon heresy of man becoming God someday:

"Jesus is the literal spirit-brother of Lucifer, a creation." (Gospel Through the Ages, p. 15)

"Long before you were born a program was developed by your creators... The principal personalities in this great drama were a Father Elohim, perfect in wisdom, judgment, and person, and two sons, Lucifer and Jehovah." (Teachings of Spencer W. Kimball, pp. 32-33)

"The appointment of Jesus to be the Savior of the world was contested by one of the other sons of God. He was called Lucifer, son of the morning. Haughty, ambitious, and covetous of power and glory, this sprit-filled brother of Jesus desperately tried to become the Savior of mankind." (Milton R. Hunter, Gospel Through the Ages, page 15)

I have not checked the citations in question, so I have no idea whether GodVoter.org gets this right. (I welcome the comments of any reader, Mormon or otherwise, who can offer a good evaluation of this.) But the Catholics, too, claim that the Mormons adopt the "doctrine of Jesus Christ being the 'spirit brother' of Lucifer." (Of course, as Elaine Pagels writes in The Origin of Satan, "As he first appears in the Hebrew Bible, Satan is not necessarily evil, much less opposed to God. On the contrary, he appears in the book of Numbers and in Job as one of God's obedient servants --a messenger, or angel... In Hebrew, the angels were often called 'sons of God'..." -- page 39).

If you've not had your fill of crazy for the day, perhaps World Net Daily will satisfy:

'Vote for Romney is vote for Satan'
Christian leader follows up Sharpton attack on Mormons
Posted: May 10, 2007
9:15 pm Eastern

While some evangelical Christians are defending the presidential candidacy of Mormon Mitt Romney from an attack by Al Sharpton, another prominent pastor is going further in his condemnation -- saying a vote for the former Massachusetts governor is a vote for Satan.

That's the word from Bill Keller, host of the Florida-based Live Prayer TV program as well as LivePrayer.com.

"If you vote for Mitt Romney, you are voting for Satan!" he writes in his daily devotional to be sent out to 2.4 million e-mail subscribers tomorrow.

Sharpton, the Democratic Party activist and former presidential candidate, has been widely condemned for singling out Romney's faith as an issue in the campaign.

"As for the one Mormon running for office, those who really believe in God will defeat him anyways, so don't worry about that; that's a temporary situation," he said.

Keller also comes out swinging against the Church of Jesus Christ of Latter-Day Saints as a cult.

"This message today is not about Mitt Romney," he writes. "Romney is an unashamed and proud member of the Mormon cult founded by a murdering polygamist pedophile named Joseph Smith nearly 200 years ago. The teachings of the Mormon cult are doctrinally and theologically in complete opposition to the Absolute Truth of God's Word. There is no common ground. If Mormonism is true, then the Christian faith is a complete lie. There has never been any question from the moment Smith's cult began that it was a work of Satan and those who follow their false teachings will die and spend eternity in hell."

See? Dobson is restrained by comparison.

And so it is that an American election for president, the most powerful political office in the world, will be determined, in part, by what members of some religious sects think about the position of another religious sect on the relationship of Jesus and Satan. Or, "My god is better than your god." Because, you know, the (alleged) idea that Jesus and Satan are "spirit brothers" is so much more bizarre than the idea that God impregnated a mortal virgin with Jesus and created Satan as an angel.

Absolute insanity.

Hello, Satan?

Here's the story, as reported by the AP:

'Very Religious Community' Gets Rid of 666 Phone Prefix
Friday, December 28, 2007

REEVES, La. — After decades of living with what Mayor Scott Walker calls a stigma, residents of this southwest Louisiana village are getting a new telephone exchange, one without the biblical connotations attached to their current 666. ...

There are three churches in town, two Bible and one Baptist, and fewer than 450 homes, he said. In the Bible, 666 is depicted as the mark of the beast, and those taking the mark would be associating themselves with Satan, he said.

"It's been a 40-year battle" to change the number, he said, counting at least four failed attempts.

This year, after a resident contacted the mayor with questions about the prefix, Walker said he polled residents and found overwhelming support for a change. He worked with the phone company, CenturyTel, and the state Public Service Commission among others to make the change. He said he began publicizing the option Sunday, addressing first the local churches and then reaching out to local media.

"It's been a black eye for our town, a stigma," he said. ... "This is a good town. ... We're good Christian people."

However, this irrational fear of the prefix 666 has nothing to do with Christianity; it is primitive superstition, on par with a fear of the 13th row on airplanes. No self-respecting Christian with a remotely sophisticated view of religion would worry about such trivial matters. From a Christian perspective, I imagine that God would prefer a charitable deed to an effort to change one's phone number. That said, the rise of evangelical Christianity accompanies a certain disdain for the principles of science. The basic rejection of evolutionary biology is barely more sophisticated than numerological superstition. New-age mysticism, environmentalist mysticism, superstitious practices , and anti-scientific evangelical Christianity are symptoms of the same cultural problems.

But it's still a pretty damn funny story. And, speaking of funny, catch Ricky Gervais's reading of Creation.

Cruise Control

Tom Cruise is an amazing man, according to his own self-evaluation. Roger Friedman has written up an account of the recently released videos in which Cruise attempts to promote Scientology (but just comes off looking weird.) Here's one of Cruise's statements, as recorded at Diana Hsieh's blog: "We are the authorities on getting people off drugs, we are the authorities on the mind, we are the authorities on improving conditions. We can rehabilitate criminals, we can bring peace and unite cultures."

Because who needs drugs when you can have Scientology?

Regarding the other claims, color me a skeptic.

I read somewhere that the church came out with a statement condemning the new "unauthorized biography" of Cruise, calling the book bigoted. However, reasoned criticism is not bigotry. I could not find the statement at Scientology.org. However, I did find the following statement:

Man is an immortal, spiritual being. His experience extends well beyond a single lifetime. His capabilities are unlimited, even if not presently realized — and those capabilities can be realized. He is able to not only solve his own problems, accomplish his goals and gain lasting happiness, but also achieve new, higher states of awareness and ability.

This is basically pop Platonism. In terms of its basic metaphysical views, the doctrines of Scientology are hardly stranger than those of Christianity. Beyond that, Scientology's specific programs, such as "auditing techniques for erasing engrams and creating Clears," constitute silly mumbo-jumbo. If you get taken in by Scientology, you deserve to be.

All that said, I've really enjoyed some of Tom Cruise's movies. Even people with quite peculiar and even horrid ideas can show great talent in certain fields. (To take another example, Bobby Fischer, who recently died, was great at chess but crazy in his evaluations of Jews and the United States. You don't need Scientology to sound like a nut.) I have no intention of reading the "unauthorized biography" of Tom Cruise. He's an actor; that's it. If he's headed for Michael Jackson Land, I could care less. And I think plenty of critiques of Scientology are out there.

Religious Insanity

Many religious people are quite rational, and they interpret their religious beliefs through the lens of worldly common sense. However, sometimes religion becomes crazy. I mean, brutally torturing people to death over slight doctrinal differences? Hanging "witches" because of absurd accusations and inconsequential physical marks? Fathers murdering their own daughters because they are dating, and grandmothers holding down their granddaughters so that butchers can tear the clitorises out of the little girls? Religion certainly has its dark faces.

Yesterday I came across two examples of religion gone mad. At least they do not involve the sort of violence against others mentioned above. But they do indicate that religious beliefs can turn crazy.

The first example involves a man who is probably clinically insane, so perhaps religious beliefs were not the main problem here; perhaps otherwise his insanity would have manifest itself differently. Here's the story:

Idaho man sees 'mark of the beast,' cuts off and microwaves hand

Associated Press

Updated 02:18 p.m., January 9, 2008

HAYDEN, Idaho -- A man who believed he bore the "mark of the beast" used a circular saw to cut off one hand, then he cooked it in the microwave and called 911, authorities said.

The man, in his mid-20s, was calm when Kootenai County sheriff's deputies arrived Saturday in this northern Idaho town. He was in protective custody in the mental health unit of Kootenai Medical Center. ...

The article speculates that the man may have been inspired by the New Testament books of Revelation or Matthew. I don't want to make too much of this example, because, again, the guy is probably quite insane for reasons that have nothing to do with religion. However, I would point out that plenty of other people have done quite crazy things (such as kill themselves) based on religious beliefs involving the Apocalypse. At a certain point, it becomes difficult to distinguish between clinical insanity and self-induced religious insanity.

At any rate, the second example definitely involves only religious beliefs, not any sort of physiologically induced break with reality. World Net Daily has published an article that advertises "WND's elite monthly Whistleblower magazine."

Whistleblower's lead article, we are told, is "Witchcraft in America:"

What is witchcraft? Is it the same as Wicca? Is it a form of Satan worship, as critics allege? Or can witches be good? Can they really cast spells that somehow call forth the spirits beyond the world of nature to help them accomplish their will – whether good or evil? Is magic real? Why do witches often perform their ceremonies naked? And most of all, why do so many people today aspire to be witches?

Okay -- does anyone in modern America, in which we are learning about the article via an expansive network of computers and power generation, actually need to read an article to learn whether witches "somehow call forth the spirits beyond the world of nature?" I mean, is this now somehow open to debate? (I keep thinking that the whole thing must be a practical joke, and I'd be relieved to discover that it is, but unfortunately it seems to be sincere.)

Oh boy:

"Witchcraft, sorcery, magic and idol worship have been around since the earliest days of man," said WND Editor Joseph Farah. "They do, indeed, pre-date Christianity as we know it today – just as their practitioners like to point out with pride. But they do not pre-date the God of Abraham, Isaac and Jacob – the one who created the universe. They are, in fact, part of a rebellion against Him and His laws."

It's difficult to pick the most ridiculous line from the article, but here's my selection:

"Top exorcist condemns 'Harry Potter'" – on the Vatican's top experts who says there's "no doubt the signature of the Prince of Darkness is in these books"

This is where I'd again usually be thinking, "Joke, right?" I mean, somebody's trying to screw with me, surely. And yet I recorded the following line from the documentary Jesus Camp, quoting a woman "teaching" young children:

"And while I'm on the subject, let me say something about Harry Potter. [Dramatic pause...] Warlocks are enemies of God. And I don't care what kind of hero the are, they're an enemy of God. And had it been in the Old Testament, Harry Potter would have been put to death." [In the background, somebody says, "Amen," as the audience bursts into applause.] "You don't make heroes out of warlocks."

So apparently, real people, people who have grown up in America, the most technologically advanced nation in world history, actually believe that J.K. Rowling, a writer of children's stories, is in league with a supernatural force of evil. That is insane.